Snippet Sunday: Forbidden, “The Paper Weight”

Sunday Snippet

HOSTED BY SNIPPET SUNDAY Click on the Snippet Sunday link to visit other author’s snippets.

Hello snippet readers/writers. Welcome to this fun group of writers who offer 8-10 lines of their writing.

Forbidden: Eliza MacKay, a traveler at a fictional Middle East country, is at the airport waiting for the rest of the Habitat for Humanity Americans to arrive. She’s nervous as this group is over an hour late. She had a vision (seer) of explosions and screams. The airport security guards have noted her nervousness and have forced her to follow them.

I welcome comments, suggestions what would make my snippet better, and what is working to make you want to read more.

Previous Snippets of this scene: 

1. https://featherstoneauthor.wordpress.com/2014/08/30/sunday-snippet-wip-forbidden/

2. https://featherstoneauthor.wordpress.com/2014/09/06/snippet-sunday-forbidden/

The Paper Weight

shutterstock_29319118-001Eliza jerked her shoulder away from his hand. Ratcheting up her bravado, she glared back at the man. Her daring appeared to have surprised him momentarily. “Fine. Where are you taking me?” she demanded.

The guards led her through the terminal and down a long hallway. They stopped briefly to frisk her and check her luggage. Once they were satisfied she posed no threat, the men brought her to a small, airless office where a heavy set man sat behind a cluttered desk. A sign on his desk read ‘Sergeant Boutros’. The guards quickly placed her luggage on a table and stood close behind her.

She noted the .357 magnum on his desk served as a paper weight on a pile of documents. She tore her eyes away.

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11 thoughts on “Snippet Sunday: Forbidden, “The Paper Weight”

  1. Great snippet. I love the gun as a paperweight — makes me think that it’s there for show because he knows he doesn’t need it. (If that one’s in the open, then what does he have that she can’t see?) Nice mind game.

    Like

  2. You made me chuckle, Linda Hamonou. Eliza’s is enough trouble without taking on the burly sergeant. I think he’s got the drop on her. LOL

    Like

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